fingers crossed

i am currently in an employment limbo. i haven't started with the tour company yet, but i've already had my last shift at the bakery. i am supposed to be spending this week browsing for new jobs. "supposed to."
but i'm having trouble staying focused. day one of my job search didnt go as planned. the problem was that it was gorgeous outside. so i decided to take advantage of the sun and head to the beach. so day one was a flop. day two proved no better. it was spent running errands. and by running errands i mean that i went to the grocery store and bought a twelve pack of reese peanut butter cups and then came back home and watched an entire season of californication. day three continued with the trend. i poured myself a vodka cran at around noon. kept those coming, ate homemade sushi and stayed in my pyjamas until four, then i headed up the street to my friends place and watched my first ever audrey hepburn movie. it was marvellous. the cycle ends tomorrow though. i have a trial shift as a nanny for a family that lives close by. i already know that i probably wont take it. the pay and hours offered are both too low.
today i got an email from the tour company about my upcoming training weekend! this weekend, easter weekend, i am going to be heading out on a four day trip to the rocky mountains! i am beyond excited. i have already made a list of stuff to remember to pack and started picking out outfits. i feel like im in elementary school, getting ready for my first real sleepover.
i failed to mention one crucial factor in my interview. or maybe they just failed to ask it.
the thing is, this is a ten hour bus ride. not only will i have to be on the bus for those ten hours. i will have to be wide awake and exciting. full of enthusiasm. engaging the tourists with funny jokes, answering questions about the area and mingling while oozing charm. now i can rock the crap out of those characteristics in any other circumstance. but once i am in a moving vehicle its like i took a hefty handful of sleeping pills and cozied up to a hot water bottle. im out. and when forced to remain awake in a moving vehicle i get uber naseaus. i get motion sick just backing out of the driveway. asking me to consult a map while the car is moving is also out of the question. so my body has come up with a coping mechanism. ever since i was little, whenever im in a car longer than about twenty minutes i fall asleep. hard and fast asleep. im always given the bitch seat on roadtrips because its not like ill be awake to complain or to take in the scenic views. just give me a nudge when we reach a pee break and im pretty much good to go. so in preparation for the demands of my new job i have developed a plan of attack. ive bought mass amounts of anti-drowsy motion sickness tablets, ginger tea, and ginger root to attack the nausea. ive also decided i will drink coffee on the days of bus travel. im not an avid caffeine ingestor (unless questionable amounts of reese pb cups count?) so i figure shocking my system with that will help keep to my eyes open and the witty commentary flowing.
i will report back next week with either a story of how awesome my training wkd was, or how i got fired for falling asleep and/or ralphing on the bus.

monday afternoon at wreck beach, vancouver

last day at the bakery. blueberry scone hand.

still settling

it has been over a month since my last post.
i've found an apartment, got a job, made new friends, got accustomed with bus routes, got a second job, quit my first job, found a market close by, got involved with the couchsurfing scene in vancouver, started exploring the city, and lots of other things that go hand in hand with settling into a new environment.
yesterday was sunny. i couldn't remember the last time i had seen the sun here in vancouver. actually i probably could tell by flipping through the photos on my phone. no doubt i capture a picture of that ball of yellow in the sky the last time it appeared. i probably was just as in awe then as i was yesterday.
about a month ago i started my job as an apprentice baker at a small bakery in east vancouver. i live about a 35 minute bus ride from work. so the change in age and race of passengers as my bus rolls through the yuppie area of kits where i live, through to the downtown business centre, past chinatown and until it drops me off just past the church-run homeless shelters and parks lined with tented soup kitchens is like a proper tour through vancouver each morning. asian students, hipster infused white young family types, business men and women, poor asians, homeless of all races, white kids saving money by living in sketchy neighbourhoods, and that is when i get off and walk a block to work.
i liked the bakery. i still do. but at minimum wage i knew it wouldn't be enough to meet my bills and save as much as i wanted to. so i started looking for something part time to work on the side. this is when i found an ad online for a tour guide position with a company called west trek tours. i applied. went for a first interview, got called back for a second and then was offered the job! i was and am still beyond excited for this position. it is a part time position primarily on the weekends. but it just seems like something i should do. i had a gut feeling about it. interacting with travellers, being loud and outgoing, getting to do all these amazing activities and get paid for it. just wild! i knew i couldn't pass it up. so i told the bakery. i knew that this new job wouldn't be able to work with the schedule the bakery wanted me for. so i told them i would go. so this week will be my last at the bakery. my first training weekend with west trek is on easter weekend from friday-monday. i will be going on their 'rockies' tour. which is four days and three nights. so now i am kind of back to square one. because now i have a part time job and i still need another job to make ends meet. so im on the hunt for employment again.
and im not as nervous or as anxious as i was the first time around. i feel like something will work out. i feel good about my decision.
i went to my first couchsurfing meeting about a month ago. vancouver is such a bigger hub for travellers than halifax. at the meeting i met people from about fifteen different countries! and i have been getting requests from travellers who want to stay with patrik and i, so hopefully soon we will host people as well.

pumpkin sourdough at the bakery

tuesday night stroll along kitsilano beach

homemade pizza and dough from work

keeping in touch [boston-vancouver]

if you click the link below it will take you to a video of the tour company i will be working for and depict some of the stuff i will be getting up to over easter weekend.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lSqy2Qu20QQ&feature=youtu.be

vancouver valentine

i live in a one bedroom basement apartment with my friend patrik. we are both stressed about trying to find a job. so today we were both out on the streets of vancouver handing out resumes with the hopes that someone will want us.

i am still waiting to be wanted, personally and professionally. 

virtual clink

by late afternoon i was out of resumes and sitting in a cafe drinking an earl grey latte. the playlist was an ironic collection of some romcom soundtrack. obviously the cafe dj did not take the time to scan the premisses to observe that there were only singles sipping on lattes. not a couple in sight. the soundtrack mocked me. 

my valentines day evening was spent navigating my way to some guys house so i could buy his iron off him, which i found on a craigslist ad. it was creepy and thrifty. when i got back to the apartment i discovered that the oven was not working. which soiled my plans for homemade sweet potato fries.

so instead i walked to the closest liquor store bought the cheapest bottle of chilled white and called it a night. got a message on skype from one of my best friends who is living in san diego. she skyped me and she too was having a glass of wine by herself, alone in her apartment.

so we did a virtual clink of our glasses and enjoyed our sad valentines day together. 

it was the perfect end to my day. minus my lingering  rage about the sweet potato fries. 

pit of doom feeling.

first photo in vancouver 

i am in vancouver.
before i left nova scotia i wasn't really worried or nervous. i felt like i was leaving on another trip.
i have only been here for a couple days but my feelings have definitely changed.
now i am constantly nervous, anxious and worried. i don't want to overstay my welcome at my friends place. which she keeps insisting isn't even close to an issue. and i get that it is mostly in my head, but i just can't help it.
everyday since i've arrived here all my thoughts have revolved around checking the apartment listings, contacting people and going to view places.
my unnerving emotions are even turning physical. i have a constant knot in my stomach that i can't get rid of. i have no interest in going out to eat or for drinks, and no interest in sight seeing at all. i won't be able to enjoy it knowing that i could be doing more to try and set up a place to call home for my time in vancouver.
i haven't even started to worry about finding a job. i am too focused on finding somewhere to rest my head where i don't have to live out of a bag.
i have two showings tonight. it would have been three, but as usual something came up with one of them. decided they weren't moving out, already found a tenant, i was too old, too young, too unemployed, too mature, too immature.
i know that in a month this will all seem like so long ago. i will be caught up in a job and this pit of doom feeling i am having will be a distant memory. but right now it is not a memory. right now i am in it. right in the middle. pit of doom.
my outlook on life feels as ominous as the grey skies in the photo above.

[fast forward four days]

i am now an official resident of vancouver. one of the places i went to see worked out. a basement apartment in an adorable little house with an adorable little family living above me. the pit of doom feeling has left my stomach, and i am now feeling naively positive about the prospect of me easily finding a job this week.
this whole beginning stage thing is weird. arriving in a new city, finding a place to call your own, getting to know your new neighbourhood, finding the cheapest grocery store and produce market.

last night my friend robyn and i waddled in the dark with an oversized futon mattress made of rocks flopped on top of our backs. robyn is about the height of an average 10 year old, which makes this visual even better. while waddling down the narrow pathway to the back of the house it hit me that this will be the longest i've lived in one place besides my home in nova scotia. i've been away from home longer, but never stationary, in one place. the thought of buying a utensil set gives me more anxiety than purchasing a one-way ticket.

no where near a grown-up.

a change will do you good

i was more than ready to come home when i was in thailand.
falling asleep at two in the afternoon on a beach off the west coast of thailand, listening to the waves crash at my feet. an ederly thai woman shouting "coke-nuts ICEY creaaaam".
i dreamt of walking my dog through the trails around my house while the autumn leaves fell. the season changed in fast forward in my head, the snow began to fall and i was bundled up in a cozy winter parka with a toque on my head.

play time with mom

it has been three months.
i am full of snuggly lovins, homemade favourites, and daytime television.
my days repeat. wake at noon. optional shower, breakfast, walk dog, watch romcom, dad gets home, read with dad in the living room till mom gets home, dinner, coronation street, more reading, mom and dad to bed, and i end up awake until two or three. hitting a really strong arts and crafts frame of mind around one. modge podge and crayola products strewn a top my desk.

my puppy, anna

but i think i've had my fill. in fact i probably had my fill after the first week. but i had to give it another three months to be really sure.
and as i mentioned before i felt more comfortable coming home this time because i had a plan. well a fetus of a plan. maybe just an egg.
i knew i would come home and get comfy. full of cuddles and carbs. then i would buy another one way ticket. i did.
hello vancouver.
"well that's great emily anne! what are you doing in vancouver?!"
"i don't know"
nothing has changed i still have no clue. i have no job. no place to live. no plan.
luckily i have a good friend who lives in the city who is letting me crash with her for the first week. and if everything goes according to the fancifull dreamlike scenario in my head, i will find an apartment and a job with ease. doubtful.
vancouver is just going to be a temporary base. maybe just the spring and summer. and then i'll be off again. no immediate plans for adulthood just yet.
wish me luck :)

ballet and booster seats

for years my mother and i have wanted to go see the nutcracker ballet together.
it has remained a subject of daydreams. every year there has been a different excuse. it was on the same day as nana's christmas party, i was out of the country, my flight got in after the show stopped for the season, too expensive, snow storm, sold out, clara broke her leg.  we could never seem to catch a break.
but this year it all changed. my aunt was given tickets to a matinee showing of the nutcracker by one of the ballet's sponsors, and she gave them to me and my mom. i was thrilled.

clara and the nutcracker

when we entered the theatre lobby i was in shock. we were giants. surrounded by hundreds of little girls and their mothers and grandmothers. a generational tradition. little girls holding cabbage patch dolls in matching gowns. GOWNS. the miniature humans were dressed in lavish dresses with crinolines poofing out above their dora the explorer winter boots. i was wearing a jean jacket and red keds. the ugly 24 year old duckling of the matinee.
five minutes until curtain and we entered. on our right sat a little girl named taylor and her mother. taylor is about five years old. she refuses to sit still. her only redeeming quality is that she is tall for her age and does not require one of the brightly coloured booster seats. which the ushers seem to be handing out like candy to ever child that walks by. not taking into consideration the lap sitters, hallway tantrumer's and aisle walkers among them. we spent the entire show hearing

"taylor sit down" 

"taylor one more time and we are leaving!"

"don't lick that!"

"QUIET people are trying to watch the show"

i adapted to taylor and her wild ways. but the four eyed blonde pigtail stick figure in front of my seat was another story. she could have cared less about the ballerinas prancing about on stage. she didn't even bat an eyelid during the set changes. in fact her eyes seemed determined to stare at everything but the stage. she sat on her knees facing me for the majority of the show. her knuckles griping the chair back, her nose squished into the seat cushion so tightly that it pushed her glasses up a couple inches higher than they should be.
the families in the aisles surrounding us had lunch boxes filled with snacks for intermission, they talked about christmas concerts, led kids down to the front of auditorium to get a peak at the symphony pit, and the said countless rounds of "excuse me, excuse me, excuse me"as they squished in and out of aisles like we were at a wiggles concert instead of the ballet.
needless to say, i can understand why my mom waited until i was 24 to take me. until i was old enough to stash snacks in my own pockets, sit quietly, and hold in my pee until it was socially acceptable to relieve myself. 

saving 101

found this gem on nomadicmatt.com this week. an article about a guy named michael who wanted to travel and got thrifty with his saving techniques in order to do so. it got me thinking about what techniques i'll have to start once i get settled in vancouver.
the following article snipit is courtesy of travel blogger matt kepnes from nomadicmatt.com.

How Michael Saved $14k in 6 Months Making $9 Per Hour

By Nomadic Matt | Published December 5th, 2012

A lot of people say you need to have a well-paying job in order to afford your trip. But Michael (age 27) never had one of those, yet he still managed to save $15k in 6 months on his trip while on making $9 USD per hour! When he told me his story, I knew he was perfect for this week’s success story. He epitomized the idea that anyone can find the money for travel. Without further ado, let’s meet Michael and find out how you save so much money while making so little!

Nomadic Matt: Tell everyone about yourself.
Michael: I was living in Austin, Texas before I became a citizen of the world. I had always wanted to take a year off and travel the world. I had taken small trips overseas in the past and would meet so many travelers who were taking months or years off to travel. Those people put the idea in my head that maybe I could travel for extended periods of time too. When I graduated from college I spent a year and a half looking for a teaching position but couldn’t find one. I started entertaining the idea of selling everything I own and taking a year off to travel, but still it didn’t really seem feasible. Since I couldn’t find a teaching position I got a job as a cook at a pizza place in Austin. I was only making $9 per hour plus tips.

How long were you planning on traveling? 
I was just planning to be gone for a year. Once I started researching how to travel the world, I came across several blogs of people offering words of encouragement and advice. I had looked up RTW tickets and thought that would be the best way to go. I had started organizing and planning the entire year; what cities I would go to, the cost of living in each country, etc. But then I thought “how the hell can someone plan for an entire year?” I was new to planning a trip but still knew there was just no way to plan anything for an entire year. Now, I’m just going to go with the flow and be gone as long as possible.

Ok, so tell us, how the heck did you save $15k in 6 months? 
I decided I wanted to save $15,000 for my trip, figuring that could last me for a year. I only had 6 months to save for my trip so I had to work my hardest to be able to get to $15,000. I say I only had six months because to keep myself from putting off the trip and keeping myself disciplined I booked my flight out of the U.S. the day I decided I was going to travel around the world.

At first I thought I would get a second part-time job, upping my total work hours to 60 a week. I was only making $9 USD per hour so it’s not like I was living the rich life. My boss ended up giving me the hours I wanted so there was no need for a second job. On top of the 60 hours he gave me, I would eat up others people’s hours if they called out of work. On average for 5 months I was working about 65 hours a week. Life was tough, but I kept my goal in sight and fought through it. In those 6 months, I put myself on a budget; I would limit myself to drinking once a week, eat food from work as much as I could, not use my air conditioner as much (that was the worst for I was living in Texas), and try to lower my electricity bill by not using as much light. Basically, I put my expenses into two columns, wants and needs (a friend of mine came up with this money saving technique). Every time I was to spend money I would ask myself if it was a want or a need. If it was a want I would usually come to the conclusion that it was a waste of money.

Aside from working I sold stuff to make money. I sold almost every electronic item I had, like my T.V., guitar amps and such. I figured I could always get those things again later in life if I wanted them. I also sold my car.

if he can do it, i can do it...again. although i have no car to sell, no air conditioning not to use, and actually no job to speak of at the moment, but i am confident that i will get creative just like michael did. it is hard sacrificing things in the present in order to save for something in the far off future. but reading stories like these helps to keep me on the right mindset.